The Football Fan’s Diet

By Matt DeReno
On The FFD

PITTSBURGH – Yesterday, I ended my non-beer drinking streak. It was bound to happen. I am happy to report I stayed within my limits though by no means did it feel like a convincing victory on The FFD. Yes, I got the TD. I got the FG. I gave up a FG for the beer. I won 10 – 3.

The thing is I came darn close to having one beer too many, which would have put me slightly over the limit. In that sense yesterday reminded me more of how sometimes the Steelers would play poorly and come away with a win nonetheless. Even though they win, the media is still difficult on them and so are the fans. Rightly, I need to be difficult on myself.

So where did I have this beer? The Highland Bar in the North Hills area of Pittsburgh. I haven’t been down to this place in a long time. It was a nice convivial atmosphere and I met my Old Man down there. We got to talking about real estate and kids when another friend of ours joined the conversation. The conversation lasted about 7 beers. Got that?

Beer as a unit of time could be a distinctly Pittsburgh contribution to the advancement of modern civilization. To be fair, I have to credit this method of time keeping to my brother Joe.
He was sharing with me a recipe for cooking on the grille the past weekend, when he said, “…close the lid and wait for six or seven beers.”

“Ah,” I said. “Did you just say wait for six or seven beers?”

“That’s right,” he said. “That’s how we keep track of time. ”

He went on to give me an example: “Tell Tom I’ll be over in a couple beers…. Let it simmer for about three or four beers…. Place in the oven and remove after about nine beers…”

Now, tonight poses another challenge. A friend is coming over this evening. We aim to grab a bite to eat and a beer. I believe we are heading to the Perrytowne Draft House. I surely don’t want to come close to blowing it like I did yesterday. And, pub grub poses its own challenges at being healthy.

So, we’ll see how I fare. Check back in about 80 Beers!