The Football Fan’s Diet

By Matt DeReno
On The FFD

PITTSBURGH – I don’t know what it is. But, I am getting lazy I think? I am starting to think I can now simply just walk all over my Inner Fat Slob. Because, I did what I had to do to score on Sunday to win the week. However, Monday was off to a really bad start. I was ravenous and ate like it. The only good to take out of Monday was that it was a non-beer day so I didn’t give up 10 points. Still, I got shut out 7-0.
Today is the last day of March. It will almost be 70 degrees. I managed to hit the gym and burn several hundred calories but it was an uninspired workout. I have to catch the fire back and fan the flames. I don’t have it right now. My momentum is gone.

I am looking at April and thinking that a good motivation would be to get that consecutive day record up to 21. That would be an accomplishment and put me back on course. I mean if this thing ended today, I guess I would have to say the FFD helped. But, it is not ending today. I am into Week 9. I have to turn back on the enthusiasm so as to not crawl back into my old losing ways.

And man. The scale bite back today. Ouch. What can be even more demoralizing is that pretty much no matter what I do the rest of the week, today’s weight is relegating me to a weight gain, even though that weight gain may be temporary and inflated from one bad day. Over time, it should work its way back down to the norm. The question is: will I?

By Matt DeReno
On The FFD

PITTSBURGH – On the last drive, I marched down the field, just about to the goal line. I beat the crap out of my Inner Fat Slob. I was in the red zone. Guess what happened? I fumbled the ball. My Inner Fat Slob picked it up and ran like the bumbling, greasy, beer-drinking fat slob it is, all the way back for a score. My Inner Fat Slob, took it to the hizzy!

Yesterday Pitt men’s b-ball team lost in a nail bitter. Me, I lost too. It was just one of those weird freaking days, where I really kicked butt at the gym but then blew it in the end anyway.

I had too much beer, even though the amounts of beer I had would not have necessarily put me over the top in terms of DGO (Daily Game Day Objective). It was the same old saw about what the beer inevitably does to me after I have a few: it fires my hunger while relaxing my inhibitions. That is not a good combination.

On the way back then from the Rochester Inn, I said, “Hmm, Wendy’s sounds pretty good right now…” And, so the day lost. But, today is a new day and I have to just simply forget about yesterday. I am comforted in thinking I know there will be more events in which drinking beer with the boys will be the norm, but right now I don’t see anything coming up for a while. I am glad. It gives me a chance to put some good work in.

More troubling is the thought when I usually lose a day, much as I did yesterday, it is very hard to get back on the winning streak. Clearly, dieting is a momentum game. When you got it, you have to ride it for all its worth. But, when you lose it—damn it is hard to get it back.

Can I isolate yesterday and just get back on track right now? I don’t see why not? I’ll give it a shot. But, history has shown it is very difficult for me to do.
Towards those ends, I am just about finished with half of the regular season on the FFD. April will be here. It is in April I want to set myself up for the playoffs. March was a good month, but I still did falter a few times. In April, I want to go on the big tear. I want it to be said that wow, this team is coming together at the right time.

I would like to actually go beyond my greatest winning streak and at shoot for 21 days. Can I do 21 days without beer? That would be monumentally difficult (if not incredibly stupid). That being the case, perhaps I might give it a try. So bring it on April.

I got the ball back now. I am currently losing this week’s game 33 – 36. This is unprecedented in the regular season. I have never been losing come Sunday. There is good reason to think I will pull it out. As I write this, I just got back from the gym. So, I know I got a FG. But, will I score the TD? A true champion will do just that. Hut. Hut. Hut.

By Matt DeReno
On The FFD

PITTSBURGH – Great. I just scored twice against my snarling inner fat gelatinous slob with two winning days since my last posting as proof positive I am superior. The game is almost tied this week but I am still down (20- 17). It is Friday and I am punting. I should have the ball back in a second. What will I do with it? Will I take it to the hizzy one more time. I need this day and the next two to win the week. If I do, I will be 9 – 0.
Greatness will be within reach.

I would like to think there is one thing any of us can do to show greatness and demonstrate it consistently. Is this about finding one’s own unique talent and way to contribute in this world unlike anyone else is capable of doing so. And, how do you know when you found it? These questions are on my mind this morning. Why so introspective? I am not sure.

Some of it may have to do with the pride I am taking in how well my better half is performing at her job at the University. She is excellent at what she does and is a natural. She gets the feedback and performs accordingly. She is an exceptional performer. Me on the other hand, I am a long term project and many of my dreams are risky and games of chance. There is no everyday payoff and sometimes that can be really tough. I have to walk the path alone for a long while. If I fail, well, I walked alone. And I guess right there is the weight loss angle for this foggy misty Friday Pittsburgh morning. When you have a lot of weight to lose, it takes time.

You have to walk alone to lose it. Nobody can help you lose it but you. This is a solitary, if not spiritual, journey you must take. You can look deep within and pay attention to yourself. You have to micromanage yourself. That sucks. Because, I typically do not like micromanagers.

I liked being given a goal and getting it accomplished and letting the means take care of the ends. However, I have learned I can’t just focus on the end result with weight loss and expect to arrive there magically. Because, when I have, I fail. When I pay attention on a daily basis, I tend to have more success.

There are many days where you feel like giving up because you don’t get the feedback accordingly. You think that because you busted your butt at the gym and then weigh more the next day, it is hopeless. But, it is not. So you have to focus on your habits daily but look at the big picture when it comes to the weight. Now that does not seem to make much sense. If anything, it underscores why weight loss is difficult. You are required to focus on everything you do, each step you take, but ignore the scale on any given day. Don’t focus on this. Focus on that. Oh, brother.

I still hate it when the scale shows a marginal gain even though I know in the back of my mind, a small gain or loss at any one given time means nothing. I have to see how I am doing on a daily basis and then take a look at it on a weekly period. Moreover, I look at the season with my wins and losses and see how that translates to meeting my goals. So far it is working. We are almost at Week 9 and I am undefeated. It shows. But, it is not easy. My Inner Fat Slob is not going to roll over.

I hope you are sticking with it too. I hope you see that if I can put together a run like this to date, so too can anyone. So keep with it.

My Inner Fat Slob punted the ball to me now. There are many ways I can give up TDs and FGs if I am not careful. For one, the Pitt Men’s Basketball team is in the Elite Eight for the first time since 1974. That probably means a trip to the Rochester Inn on Saturday. We are seeing some more friends this evening. There could be a happy hour today. All of this makes my Inner Fat Slob smile its crooked teeth at me. What will I do? I have to focus. Greatness is within our reach.. Hut. Hut. Hut.

By Matt DeReno
On The FFD

PITTSBURGH – I am better than my Inner Fat Slob, self-doubts be damned! Indeed, I am sitting here with the football of health and I am getting ready to hike it. My Inner Fat Slob stares at me from across the scrimmage line of health and is talking some major trash:

“You fat ass… You suck. You will lose all that you gained! Get ready to punt and get ready to get your ass handed to you fatso,” says my Inner Fat Slob.

Since the game whistle blew on Week 8, I got scored on twice. Moreover, I think yesterday was the first time I ever lost on a Tuesday. That being so, it seems I am capable of loosing on any given day just like on any given Sunday in the NFL, even the Browns are capable of pulling an upset. Although, I don’t think that would apply if the Browns were to play the Steelers anytime soon. But, I digress.

Today, I decided I will get back. I am actually losing the week now and have been shut out on Monday and Tuesday and being down at all during the regular season is a first. I have today and the rest of the week to right the ship and turn this awful beginning to Week 8 around. I am confident I can do so. Why? I am not sure.

Maybe I am starting to develop a little champion swagger? That is I have no doubt in my mind I am going to win this week. I am losing 20 – 0. Is that having some footballs or what?

I went the gym today for a bit to help in that regards. I got to get back to my routine and do what I know I can do. If I put the work in, I will beat my Inner Fat Slob. It has no chance.
I also have to remember I am only halfway there in both the season and my goals. Halfway is not there. So today I resolve to start a new winning streak.

I got the ball back now after being lazy and “letting” my Inner Fat Slob score on both Monday and Tuesday. Now, I want to ram the ball down the throat of my Inner Fat Slob during the rest of the week. I want to take a break from the beer too. Why give up the points? It will be there when I want it to be there.

I also want to go on a mid-season rampage. I need to start getting my ass into gear again. I can’t have a letdown. Oh, my Inner Fat Slob is waiting for the snap. My Inner Fat Slob is laughing at me. My Inner Fat Slob is licking its chops.

I only smile. Hut. Hut. Hut.

PITTSBURGH – Yesterday was a tough day and I lost. I got unnerved. Why? I think it had more about self-doubts than anything. I will say some of it has to do with working for other people and I will leave it at that. But, the point is, sometimes you doubt yourself. You doubt what you are doing. You doubt if you have the skills to do what you want to do and you doubt your own value as a person because of it. Then, usually, you eat a meal and feel better? Is this you too?

It is a bad mindset to be in and it makes you want to give up on whatever you have sought out to do in the first place. Now, I am speaking more in terms of other career endeavors here and not necessarily about my efforts to lose weight. However, so far as my career endeavors apply to my weight loss efforts, the two are inextricably related, much as my health is inseparable from all areas of my life, career and otherwise. Hence, health is very important. The people with poorest health are dead people.

There is no line between one’s personal health and one’s life ambitions. Your healthiness either helps or prevents you from reaching goals or your goals make you unhealthy or healthy as a result. Such was the case yesterday when I said screw the FFD, doubted myself, wallowed in it, then swallowed it and lost the day.

I didn’t go nuts and I didn’t give in to a binge or anything like that but I surely missed my mark yesterday and it showed on the scale today to some degree. But, what are you going to do? That is life. And today, I am not totally out of the funk.

I am probably wrestling with giving up on some level today or kicking it back into high gear. It’s starts with a decision and it is one I have not made yet.

I am deciding whether I should give up again or begin anew, get right back on track with FFD and my career plans. Man, it is all too easy to wallow in doubt. Doesn’t that suck? It is like right out of Godfather III: Just when I think I got it all figured out, my Inner Fat Slob pulls me back in. Just when I think I got a plan that will work for me, my self-doubt pulls me back in.

So as I write this, I am still in self-doubt. When I am in self-doubt, I am hungrier, literally. I have to fight through this. I have to transfer this literal hunger to a hunger in other areas of my imperfect life. I have to find solace in health and not food. This is far easier said than done. I am sure you agree, if you, like me, have been one to find comfort in “The Colonel”, wanted at “Wendy’s” Much appreciated at “McDonalds”—You get the point.

I know such reaching moments are fewer now because I am making progress, but they are not totally eliminated and that is as frustrating today as it was in January before I made any progress at all. I am also irritable today.

I am pissed that my plans are not unfolding perfectly they way that they should be unfolding. Life is like that though right? You want it one way and it works for a while but no sooner than it works you, you find this world is not like one big Burger King: you can’t get it your way. You have to take what life gives you and give it what you can take. I am not a fan of reverse sentence philosophy but I think there is a kernel of truth in that phrase somewhere.

The perceived arrogance of others is easily enough to trigger self-doubt. Man, it pisses me off that I am not stronger than that connection. I know intellectually it is all bull shit. But, emotionally it isn’t so easy. I am not pointing the finger at emotions here either.

Emotions are powerful indications that we need to do something different – to change our state of mind. To get out of self-doubt. To go conquer the world or something that will fill us with a sense of value and contribution. The whole system, my system and your system, is very complex and it motivates us to do and accomplish very complex things.

So by its nature, it is difficult to objectively criticize your own system that made you the way you are and still makes you evaluate things the way you do now. Why is this? We think we are better than our own systems. And you get pissed, if you are like me, when you own damn system is working against you because what can you possibly do to fix it? Are you with me on that?

It is like, “Damn you Me System, how can you simply screw me up like that when all is going well and why the hell did I ever believe you could do something right damn Me System of me? Can’t I fire you? Can’t I trade you for some other system. This system sucks!”

Much like the old axe that the same level of thinking that caused a problem will not be enough to solve it, our Me Systems are perpetually and genetically hindering or helping us at the same level of thinking that caused the problem. What can we do to get around that? Go outside the system? Ask advice and guidance from others who have better systems? Yes. However, if you do that, isn’t your Me System actually solving the problem on some level. Is there a paradox in there somewhere?

I don’t know the answers to all those questions. I suspect we have to forgive our own systems for what they are: systems. No system is perfect. The FFD isn’t perfect. Much like we are not perfect or anyone is perfect in one particular sense. The smug arrogance of others is masked by the insecurities they don’t’ want us to see because any human being that doesn’t question his own system at one time or another in his life is no human being at all. He is like Adolf Hitler at worst and at best, a first class asshole.

No man has it all figured out and we should have no doubt in that. Maybe the Universe is perfect in its imperfection and the world of the Zen Buddhist can see beyond the duality of perfection and imperfection, Ying and Yang and all that stuff in between. Here on the level of the FFD, imperfection makes me eat. I got to get around that somehow.

By Matt DeReno
On The FFD

PITTSBURGH – Somehow we got to Week 8 of the regular season. Wow. Time is really starting to speed up on this crazy thing called the FFD. The season is slowly but surely moving fast. Now, I will keep it quick and fast too on this temperate Monday morning because I have a lot going on at work and in all my freelance web design stuff.

Somewhere along the line I got the silly notion I should incorporate my Scratch Writing company, which I did last week. Why? I suppose because starting a company in the middle of a economic depression seems like something stupid to say I did. In any case, my aim in Week 8 is to dominate my Inner Fat Slob much like I did all this past week.

Speaking of domination, I was hoping to see Pitt dominate Oklahoma St. yesterday in the NCAA tournament. It didn’t happen, but the Panthers won on a great game by Sam Young (I know this is a football fan’s diet, but we can pause for some March Madness action can’t we?).

I did, as I mentioned previously, watch the game at the Rochester Inn yesterday on one of their many hanging HD TVs. I am happy to say yesterday was both a victory in terms of the FFD and Pitt hoops. I had a few beers. Pitt made the right baskets. In both cases, the dreams continue.

I kept the beer down and the exercise up. Oklahoma St. made like 11 three pointers in the first half and did create some area for concern. However, Pitt put in a workman like performance in the second half and, clearly more talented, won the day. Although, they were a bit lazy on some routine passes. Speaking of which, I want to be on guard this week for lazy passes of my own.

I want to guard against a letdown but getting too comfortable with the daily process of being healthy and skipping over the small things that will keep me going strong. For instance, even though it has become habit and I don’t really need to put that I am going to the Y on my Outlook Calendar, I still do anyway. It is a reminder as much as a habit to keep me going.

When I stop putting it on the calendar, then I just might not go one day. We all know what happens then. One thing leads to the next and there is no more Y but plenty more pie. We don’t want that to happen. But, what do I have to bitch about? I won the week.

In fact, I put up 7 consecutive 10s to match the highest score possible of 70, something I haven’t done in a few weeks. I gave up 9 points—3 days of Beer will do that. But, dare I say, I lived with the beer and kept it within good norms and the scale still worked to my advantage. Moreover, I dropped another 5 lbs.

On a bit of a plateau right now, but I want to focus on having another great week and even a greater week after. In fact, my new personal challenge to is extend the daily winning streak to 3 Weeks. That would be 21 consecutive winning days (You may recall my best to date is 18 consecutive days).

I would imagine if Pitt wins Thursday then we have another meeting at the Rochester Inn to look forward to and that means another opportunity to rein in the beer. So, I will put that date on the calendar right next to the appointment at the Y. Happy Monday.

By Matt DeReno
On The FFD

PITTSBURGH – While the subject of loopholes are all the buzz, what with AIG executive bonuses being bandied about in the media, I thought I would take a moment to discuss my loopholes. However, my loopholes are literally just that – loopholes on my belt.

When you use a rusty screwdriver to add another hole to your belt so it fits better, you can only justify the barbaric tailoring if the new hole is put in place so that it holds up your pants and not is there to loosen a python’s grip on your flab.

In other words, I would hate to destroy a fine leather accessory (Target, $9.99) by punching a crude hole in it so as to loosen its bottleneck on my waistline. Luckily, that is not what I had to do. You see, yesterday, I made the loophole tailoring with a dirty old Philips screwdriver while standing in my garage holding my pants up with one hand and my belt pulled taut around the piercing head of the rusty Stanley tool (now just think how that would sound if I messed up and wrote “Stanley’s tool”?).
The bottom line is I ran out of loopholes to make my belt smaller and therefore felt justified in taking tailing matters to my own garage. Call it vigilante tailoring!

Oh, the joy I took in punching a screwdriver through my belt to make another hole. I expect in a few weeks, the belt will be totally useless. The pants too, by the way, are close to being waylaid to the garbage can or secondhand store.

I liked these pants. These twill pleated jobs from Old Navy nicely covered my fat ass since I bought them in October. Now, I can almost pull them off without unbuttoning them. Good riddance I say. Somewhere a carnival caravan can use the material to make a circus tent.

I should also ad that I am still suffering this damnable sinus cold. It is mostly confined to my head, which means I had ample energy to hit the gym yesterday. What a day at the gym it was too.
I burned over 1,000 collective calories— for the first time ever— between the climber and the stepper machine at the Y. Later that day, I walked Coconuts, my dog, for an hour. I actually wound up burning more calories on the whole then I took in on the day. Is that good? Is that bad? I don’t know. Funny though, this morning on the scale, this negative caloric intake for the day didn’t really make a difference on the digital scale.

I thought about that for a second. There have been times where I was close to having a negative caloric intake for the day before and so I know it was in reach if all the right variables were in place (such as swallowing a balloon and not being able to shovel anything down my pie hole). Minus the balloon, such was the case yesterday. I burned more calories than I logged.

Now that I did that, I have no desire to do it again. I think the danger is that you start on this mindset that the less calories, the less carbs, the less of this or that I have the better. So why wouldn’t nothing be the best?

Well, our bodies surely need fuel and “nothing” is not fuel. Negative caloric balances aren’t nutritious. In fact, negative calorie balances should probably be called starving. But, funny, I don’t really feel that hungry at all yesterday.

So the lesson is that I put up a negative caloric balance but I am not ever going to go out of my way to do it again. If I exercise the hell out of the Y then I will be sure to have a nice fat sandwich later in the day or pray tell, a frothy mug of hops and barely.

You see, I am not out to be the next Nicole Ritchie and the last time I checked, I don’t’ have a leading actor role to prepare for. So, I am looking better and feeling better. That is what the FFD is all about. That is what I am trying to do. I don’t want to have to create loopholes like starving myself to achieve the end result. I will, however, make loopholes on my belt if I have to. If I need a screwdriver to do so, then so be it. Speaking of screwdrivers, now where did I leave the orange juice? 

By Matt DeReno
On The FFD

PITTSBURGH – I am at my Carnegie Mellon office now relishing the fact my pants, which I had purchased at Old navy last fall, should be flung to the breeze like some giant battle flag. Well, if you can call defeating cheeseburgers a battle of some sorts, then I suppose that would hold some relevance. However, “the mission” is not yet accomplished. I don’t’ want to be known like George W. Bush for standing on the deck of a warship proclaiming “mission accomplished,” when the hard work truly remains to be done.

I surely have made great progress, there is no doubt, but the season is not even halfway over. We are surely where we want to be at this juncture, but there is still a heck of a lot of football, a lot of “mission” if you will, to accomplish in the coming months. Then, even if we do accomplish our goal, which could happen, then we have to find a way not have a Super Bowl hang over. We have to find a way to maintain it or it is all for naught.

Okay, there I am getting ahead of myself. We are in week 7 of the Regular season. There is 9 more weeks until the playoffs. It won’t get any easier and here is why: with the nice weather come plenty more opportunities to drink beer, eat like a pig and pack on the pounds.

You see it is easy to be relatively secluded in the arctic doldrums of Pittsburg in January, February and even March to some degree. But, now that more temperate climes are arriving, there will undoubtedly be more outdoorsy type of opportunities to grill food, drink beer and bask in the sun. After all, we both know the summer holidays will be here before we know it.

Already, we got March Madness upon us and “Pitt could be it” this year. I mean they beat the number one team twice already. Towards those ends, I plan on joining a friend this Sunday at the Rochester Inn in Pittsburgh to watch Pitt’s second round game (Here’s hoping that Friday’s first round game is merely a formality). I have to find a way to come away with a victory on that day.
So, this Sunday there will be beer. And, it will not get any easier as the spring rolls forward to the lazy summer.

The Mission is not accomplished and I have to keep that in my mind and stay focused. Sometimes success can get to your head. Just because I am slightly more than halfway toward my ultimate weight loss goals, I can’t rest on my fat laurels. I have to stay hungry for thin! I have to remember the Super Bowl champions play at the higher level week in and week out.
As we approach the midpoint of the season, this is what I want to focus on: Mission not yet accomplished!

By Matt DeReno
On The FFD

PITTSBURGH – Every day now I read an article or two about why it is so important to get down to a decent weight. In short, you take years off your life if you don’t. I think this article went on to explain that people with a BMI (Body Mass Index) over 40 can expect to live an average of 3 to 10 years less than people just in the overweight BMI range. Rest assured, there was something comforting in the fact that the people that were underweight were just as likely to not live as long either (take that you skinny pricks out there).
Okay here is the title of the article with a link: Heavy? You may live three to 10 years less: Extra pounds as bad for health as lifetime of smoking, large study says

The point is there is so much to gain by stopping one’s weight gain. You have your health, more energy, which means more capacity to do stuff, even stupid stuff, if that is what you really want to do. I mean, if you want to sit around and watch football all day, chances are if you are overweight you would typically fall asleep during the game from all that insulin in your system or whatever. So, lose weight and watch more football.

Case in point: here we are on a Wednesday and I have more energy because there is less of me to love and I am finding pants that I have not worn in years—some even with the tags on them. I called them “hope pants.” These are pants you buy even though you can’t wear them but you have the hope that in a few months, they will fit like a well-oiled catcher’s mitt.

However, far too often these “hope pants” collect “desperation dust”. I have a few pair that have cycled through what was even fashionable at one time. They were out of fashion, collected dust for so long, they are back in fashion. That is kind of nice. But, anyway, you have your hope pants and you have your reasons to exercise.

Lately, even my whole family has been getting in on the game of more exercise (even though I am only one with weight issues). Yesterday we all went for an evening stroll after dinner down to a local park, where Coconuts shed enough hair to make it look like someone had sacrificed a wild beast near a park bench. Coconuts, by the way, is my crazy English Setter. At night, we all slept better. So did Coconuts.

I still got a ways to go, but as the more temperate climes seem to be returning to the Pittsburgh area, I am staying the course. Now, back to more of the stupid stuff I plan to do today because of the increased energy stores. Well, I don’t have all day to list the stupid things I will do but rest assured I have more energy to be stupid.

We got the big fat W!

Here is the latest link for the Weekly Press Conferences. Sorry I have been lax but you know what – I have a cold too. You can tell. If you want to listen to me wax about food and football with a cold, then by all means…

I will say the last three weeks have all been wins. We are 6-0 and that is not too flabby (a better word choice than shabby when considering our goals).

Listen to The FFD Weekly Press Conference

Week 6 Regular Season Press Conference
Week 5 Regular Season Press Conference
Week 4 Regular Season Press Conference